我的退休生活 The Joy of Retirement
Most people say retirement is wonderful, the best thing I ever did in my life. I’m busier now than when I was working. Well, guess what? It isn’t so!
大多數人都說，退休生活好極了，是他們一生中做過的最棒的事情。退休了比工作時更忙。猜猜怎麼着？其實並不然！Granted my retirement didn’t begin as a clearly defined plan. Mine was more spontaneous. I left work on Friday and on the next Tuesday I started using my sick leave to the end of my work year. This was an opportunity to find out if retirement was what I wanted to do and also to exit a difficult situation gracefully.
我承認自己的退休生活並不是按着明確計劃開始的，而是更隨性而行。我週五離開工作崗位，接着的週二我就開始請病假，直至正式退休的日子到來。這段時間是個好機會，讓我好好琢磨自己到底是否想退休，同時也能從一個困境中優雅地全身而退。Initially there was euphoria of “WOW! This isn’t bad!” That lasted about two weeks. Then I decided, “Well, I should be doing something productive.” So, I cleaned house, sorted through drawers, gave away unwanted furniture, knickknacks and clothing. Another two weeks. Reality began to set in.
起初，一切都很愉快——“哇啊！這還不錯呀！”但這隻持續了大約兩個星期。然後我決定：“嗯，我應該做一些有建設性的事情。”於是我開始打掃房屋，整理抽屜，丟掉不需要的傢俱、雜物和衣物。又這樣過了兩個星期。現實開始浮現。
Here I am, a middle-aged, single woman, in a 2,000-square foot house. My job is gone, my life is changing at the speed of light and the “retirement” plan hasn’t shown up. Everyone told me, articles described, I envisioned a planned retirement. Wait, I’m supposed to plan it? I think I missed that part or maybe it was just the financial part that was supposed to be planned…I’m not sure.
我是一箇中年的單身女人，住在一間兩千平方英尺大的屋子裏。我的工作沒了，生活正以光速改變着，而“退休”計劃還沒有蹤影。每個人都對我說，文章裏也曾經描述過，我會迎來一個有計劃的退休生活。等等，我應該有所計劃？我想我大概是忘了這一點，也許只是財政這方面需要好好計劃而已……我也不太確定。Alone, lonely, and no plan. This is awful! I hate it! By the third month, I was sinking into a depression that threatened my health and sanity. I began to cry buckets of tears as my friends and acquaintances told me how lucky I was. I wasn’t feeling lucky. I was feeling desperate. My sick leave was draining away so I started making the hard decisions.
孤單，寂寞，又沒有計劃。這太糟了！我討厭這種狀態！到了第三個月，我逐漸陷入抑鬱，健康和精神狀態面臨嚴重挑戰。當朋友和熟人說我多麼幸運時，我總會大哭起來。我並不認爲自己有多幸運。我感到絕望至極。我的病假快要休完了，於是我開始做出艱難的決定。First, I filed retirement papers and made it official. In one case, I was retired in 15 minutes—thanks to my paperwork organizational skills. I hyperventilated for 30 minutes with shock. The other situation took 45 minutes; thank goodness, I had time to breathe. Second, I took stock of a guaranteed income for life finding I could at least pay bills and buy groceries.
首先，我提交了報告，正式申請退休。有一次，我只花了15分鐘就真正退休了——多虧了我的文書組織能力。接下來的30分鐘我因爲震驚不已而不斷喘着粗氣。還有一次花了我45分鐘；謝天謝地，我終於可以喘一口氣了。接下來，我估量了自己固定的生活保障收入，發現我至少能支付各種賬單和購買日用品。By month four I knew that I was bored, didn’t have enough hobbies, and so far hated retirement. And I was even more alone, lonely, and isolated. I’d taken a few trips, some alone, others with family, even tried a “casual” relationship. Nothing was working so far.
到第四個月，我知道自己開始感到厭煩了，我沒有足夠的興趣愛好，到當時爲止依然討厭退休。我覺得更加孤單、寂寞和離羣索居。我外出旅行過幾次，有時獨身一人前往，有時跟家人一起去，甚至還嘗試隨便拍拍拖。然而，一切都沒啥效果。So, I sat down and listed the positives and negatives of my life and found I had far more positives than negatives. An old friend told me years ago during a time of decline in my life to “hitch up my girdle and stop feeling sorry for myself.” Good idea!
於是，我坐下來，列出生活中的積極面和消極面，發現積極面遠超過消極面。多年前當我處於一次人生低潮期時，一位老朋友曾勸誡我“擡頭挺胸，別再怨天尤人。”好主意！I got a part-time job, one that uses my skills and allows me to travel. I’m visiting places I haven’t seen for many years and ones I’ve never been to before. I’m learning to turn the loneliest days of the week into busy ones of housekeeping and laundry; to shop in the middle of the week, and visit my not yet retired friends during their lunch hours. I’m also taking a deep look at what I want for the rest of my life and starting to branch out and discover new opportunities.
我找了一份兼職，既可以運用我的技能又能讓我到處旅遊。我現在可以去那些很多年來沒能再去的地方，以及一些從未去過的地方。我學會將一星期中最孤獨的幾天轉變成打掃和洗衣服的忙碌日子；每週中間的日子去購物，在午飯時間探望我那些還未退休的朋友。我更深遠的去思索自己餘下的人生最想要的是什麼，也開始向外拓展，發掘新的機遇。Nine months into retirement, I know I have to continue creating “the plan.” I’m getting to understand that I need a strong spiritual life to guide my thoughts and lead me. I know I need friendship and companionship to maintain my emotional and physical health and a means of helping my community. Retirement is getting better and ultimately I do believe that I will find it wonderful, the best thing I’ve ever done, and busy in a satisfying way.
退休九個月了，我知道我必須繼續譜寫我的“退休計劃”。我逐漸明白到，我需要一種強大的精神生活來指導我的思想，帶領我向前。我知道我需要友誼和陪伴來保持身心健康，也需要藉助某種途徑回報社區。退休生活漸漸好轉起來，最終我確信，我會發現退休生活好極了，是我一生中做過的最棒的事情，忙併快樂着。
